Lawyers are trash and I'm in law school.

Earlier today in my prayer time, I found myself just thanking God for EVERYthing. I’m in such a good mental space and, because I know how it feels NOT to be in this space, my heart just overflowed with gratitude.

God impressed on my heart that much of my ability to experience contentment, or this “good mental space” was contingent upon my obedience. 

Let me give you some background.

I’m currently enrolled in law school and grad school…yeah…at the same time. I do believe it is the will of God and it took me some time to REALLY TRULY become sold out to the idea. I fought it for as long as I could. Even in undergrad, I just KNEW I was going into sports/event management. I just KNEWWW I was NOT going to law school. I don’t even like lawyers! I thought (and still think) lawyers are TERRIBLE people and “justice” is a farce.  I made affirmative steps to secure that I wouldn’t have to go to law school and…all of those plans fell through! Hahaha! (It’s funny now but at the time, it was not pretty. God literally broke me ALL the way down.)

It reminds me a lot of the story of Jonah.

See, Jonah was like me (or I was like Jonah, rather). God told him to go to Nineveh and he was like, “Yeah, no the people in Nineveh are trash…I’d rather go to Tarshish.” We know the story. Jonah goes to Tarshish, gets in a terrible storm, gets thrown overboard, and ends up in a big ‘ole fish. He ends up turning back to God and goes to law school…I mean, Nineveh.

The beauty in the story of Jonah is that God’s grace kept him even when he was sinking in floods and drowning in stormy waves. He literally said in Jonah 1:6 that he was “locked out of life and imprisoned in the land of death.” Whoa there, kid!

As beautiful as it is that God’s grace kept him, wouldn’t it have been easier for him just to go to Nineveh in the first place? Wouldn’t it have been easier to just NOT fight the will of God? 

What’s even crazier is that Jonah wasn’t a “bad guy.” He had a relationship with God. God selected him out of alllllll people, clearly he was doing SOMETHING right….BUT…his disobedience still landed him in the “depths of the abyss” for a few nights.

Here’s what Jonah’s experience tells me: 

Even when it’s something that I don’t want to do, OBEDIENCE still feels WAYYYYY better than disobedience. 

As much as I don’t want to be in law school, I feel GREAT knowing that I’m in the will of God and everyday…little by little…I’m more grateful for this experience because I know that it’s not about me or my feelings.

See, what Jonah failed to realize on his way to Tarshish was that going to Ninevah wasn’t even about him. It was about the people who needed the word that Jonah had. Not only that, but God trusted Jonah to get that word to some spiritually starving people. 

We’ve heard that story before. See, God trusted that Jesus would come and do what he had to do…AND he did! He fulfilled His purpose EVEN until death!!

Now, I’m not saying that I’m about to save a whole country from being destroyed, but I know that this entire process isn’t about me. I find comfort in knowing that it’s not about my feelings. 

While I still think lawyers are trash…and they ARE.....

I’m just grateful that God trusted me with this portion and I’m excited to see what he continues to do through my obedience!!!