Delulu: When Faith is All You Got

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So, first let me say, I think this is my first blog in probably 8 months. I'm in a very interesting era and for some reason writing just isn't as much of a flow as it used to be. Honestly, it feels more like a force than a flow and because of that, despite the fact that my brain is always going, sometimes...nothing comes out. I'm confused....I don't understand it, but such is life. Ha!

I literally had this conversation with God this morning. "God, I'm confused. I feel like I'm in the middle of the ocean, in a really crappy boat....and I really want to jumpship but I can't swim and I don't have a life jacket...and to add to that, even if I could jumpship, I don't even know how to get back to shore. Like, which way is back? I'm just...lost. I'm so lost that the only thing I can do is trust You."

I thought that last line was a pretty profound moment in and of itself...but then I was reminded of an episode of Spongebob. 

...and while I never imagined that Spongebob would be the thing that re-ignites my exposition, here we are.

Stay with me.

So, in this particular episode Patrick and Spongebob convince themselves to trust a magic conch. Now, this magic conch is basically this toy that gives them random answers to questions...or so it seems. At a point in the episode, Spongebob, Patrick and Squidward find themselves in the middle of nowhere. They're surrounded by...IDK..maybe kelp...it's like a lot of green squiggles. Squidward, who is the logical one of the bunch, is freaking out. Patrick and Spongebob recognize that they're in a predicament, but the conch is basically telling them to chill. So...they chill. In true Bikini Bottom fashion, random things start happening, but Spongebob and Patrick just kept trusting the conch. Days go by and eventually they all get hungry...but remember the magic conch said chill. So, Patrick and Spongebob are still chilling. Meanwhile, Squidward starts cooking bugs while teasing Spongebob and Patrick, trying to get them to stop being delusional with this "magic conch"...but they don't budge...and eventually food drops from the sky and lands perfectly in place in front of them (Side Note: We can talk about God preparing a table before you in the presence of your enemies another day, but I digress! HA!). They, of course, attribute this random blessing to the magic conch. 

Sometimes, like Spongebob, Patrick, and Squidward,  we find ourselves in really crappy situations...and sometimes those situations are so ridiculously crappy that all we can do is trust the magic conch...all we can do is trust GOD!!! 

I'm not trying to be factious, but sometimes all you have is your faith. Faith that it'll all work out for your good...faith that there will be another side....faith that the God who brought me to this point will get me through this point....faith that this is not where the story ends....faith that things will get better. 

Sometimes all you got left is faith.

For those of you who want a biblical reference...I think about Job and the back to back Ls he took. After a series of death, loss, and pure travesty, he had to deal with his own Squidwards. His friends were talking crazy. His wife even told him to curse God and die....but he came to a resolve in Job 13:15 and said, "Though he slay me, yet will I trust him." In that moment Job was saying, despite the fact that God allowed all these uncomfortable things to happen....I intentionally choose to continue to trust Him and obey. 

I'm sort of at that point right now. I'm not gone lie.....I am lost as a ball in high weeds....or better yet lost as Spongebob, Patrick and Squidward in the middle of some kelp. I have no idea what God is doing over here...and the minute I feel like I can trace it, there's just another bombshell. My brain is definitely Squidward, telling me I'm delusional, but my spirit is giving very much Spongebob and Patrick willing to trust the conch and chill. My spirit is echoing Job...Though I don't know what God's doing, though it's uncomfortable and unfamiliar, though it feels at times like God is slaying me....I'm willing to trust Him and obey...if anything just to see what happens next.

If you think about it, God got us this far, surely He's got a plan for the rest of the way. Right?

....and I don't want to leave you hanging. The ending of that episode of Spongebob was very anticlimactic. The episode actually ends with them still being stuck in the kelp, but we can infer that they eventually got out because there were subsequent episodes where they weren't in the kelp. So, it's good to know that the scenery does change at some point...and that's biblical too...go read Ecclesiastes 3.

I hope that encourages you like it encouraged me. Sometimes you just gotta trust the magic conch, okay!?  Seriously though, if trusting God makes us look a tad bit delusional, then so be it. 

Besides...if the substance of things hoped for and the evidence of things not seen is faith...then if the faith doesn't look a little delulu, is it even really faith?

Exactly.